Love Doctor Revision Round

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Wordy to concise: revision round.

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Jen Gwyneth Suguitan

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Love Doctor Revision Round


Love Doctor Revision RoundVersión en línea Wordy to concise: revision round. por Jen Gwyneth Suguitan 1 Which sentence best expresses, "I like you because you are a person who is very nice and good"? Hint: This is too "wordy." Say it more directly! a You are a human being who has a nice personality. b I appreciate your kindness. c You are a nice person. d I like you because you are a person who is very nice and good. 2 Choose the cleaner sentence: 'We should go to the park together at the park today.' Hint: You said "park" twice! It sounds repetitive. a Let’s go to the park together today. b We should go to the park together today. c Today at the park we shall go to the park. d Today at the park we shall go to the park. 3 Best option for 'I am mad because you didn't call me'? Hint: In a formal letter, "mad" sounds a bit childish. Use a more "grown-up" word. a I am mad because you didn't call me. b I am angry that we didn't speak. c I am upset that you didn't call me. d I am disappointed that we didn't speak. 4 Which sentence is best for tone change: 'You are the bestest friend in the whole world ever'? Hint: "Bestest" isn't a real word. Let's fix the grammar. a You are the more better friend ever. b You are a very good friend indeed. c You are the bestest friend in the whole world ever. d You are my most wonderful friend. 5 Formal way to ask about relationship status? Hint: not demanding a Please tell me if you like me. b Tell me right now if you like me. c I would like to clarify the status of our relationship. d I want to know if you still love me. 6 Precise wording for accountability: 'I'm sorry for the stuff I did'? Hint: "Stuff" is too vague. What did you actually do? a I am sorry for things and items. b Sorry for the things I did. c I apologize for my recent mistakes. d I am sorry for the stuff I did. 7 Polite request: 'Give me a second chance please' should be? Hint: This is okay, but it lacks "heart." Make it more formal and persuasive. a I am asking for the opportunity to make things right. b Please give me another chance now. c I need another try immediately. d I want another try right away. 8 Revised sentence with semicolon: 'Our love is like a flower that grows in the dirt but it is pretty but sometimes it wilts'? Hint: Too many "buts"! The sentence is "running away" from you. a Love is a dirt flower and it is pretty but also it dies. b Our love is a flower; though it faces challenges, it remains beautiful. c Our love is a simple flower that sometimes wilts. d Our love remains pretty, even when it wilts. 9 Formal inquiry about no longer talking: 'I am writing this to ask you why you don't talk to me anymore'? Hint: This is a Letter of Inquiry! Make the "Inquiry" part sound professional. a Why don't you talk to me anymore? b I am inquiring about the recent lack of communication between us. c Why are you being silent and not talking to my face? d Please tell me why you ignore me. 10 Declaring confident friendship: 'I think maybe we should perhaps try to be friends again'? Hint: You sound unsure because you used "think," "maybe," and "perhaps" all at once. Be confident! a Perhaps we could be friends. b Maybe perhaps I think we could be friends. c I believe we can rebuild our friendship. d We should maybe try to be friends again. Feedback 1 Answer: B. It removes unnecessary words ("person who is") for a cleaner statement. 2 Answer: A. It eliminates the redundancy of repeating the location. 3 Answer: D. "Disappointed" is more precise and mature than "mad." 4 Answer: D. "Wonderful" is grammatically correct and sounds more sincere. 5 Answer: C. It uses formal language ("clarify," "status") instead of a blunt demand. 6 Answer: C. "Mistakes" is a specific noun, whereas "stuff" means nothing. 7 Answer: A. Using "opportunity" shows more respect for the other person's choice. 8 Answer: B. It uses a semicolon and better transitions ("though," "remains") to connect ideas. 9 Answer: B. "Inquiring" and "lack of communication" are perfect formal letter terms. 10 Answer: C. Deleting "filler words" makes the writer sound sure of themselves.

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Love Doctor Revision Round

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Love Doctor Revision RoundVersión en línea

por Jen Gwyneth Suguitan

Which sentence best expresses, "I like you because you are a person who is very nice and good"? Hint: This is too "wordy." Say it more directly!

Choose the cleaner sentence: 'We should go to the park together at the park today.' Hint: You said "park" twice! It sounds repetitive.

Best option for 'I am mad because you didn't call me'? Hint: In a formal letter, "mad" sounds a bit childish. Use a more "grown-up" word.

Which sentence is best for tone change: 'You are the bestest friend in the whole world ever'? Hint: "Bestest" isn't a real word. Let's fix the grammar.

Formal way to ask about relationship status? Hint: not demanding

Precise wording for accountability: 'I'm sorry for the stuff I did'? Hint: "Stuff" is too vague. What did you actually do?

Polite request: 'Give me a second chance please' should be? Hint: This is okay, but it lacks "heart." Make it more formal and persuasive.

Revised sentence with semicolon: 'Our love is like a flower that grows in the dirt but it is pretty but sometimes it wilts'? Hint: Too many "buts"! The sentence is "running away" from you.

Formal inquiry about no longer talking: 'I am writing this to ask you why you don't talk to me anymore'? Hint: This is a Letter of Inquiry! Make the "Inquiry" part sound professional.

Declaring confident friendship: 'I think maybe we should perhaps try to be friends again'? Hint: You sound unsure because you used "think," "maybe," and "perhaps" all at once. Be confident!

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