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marco rabadan
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Leaving home ? Possibly not !

We all love our children , but it's rather nice when they have their own home , isn't it ?

Picture the scene , the opening sequence of your favorite television program has just started , you have sole possession of the most comfortable sofa , and a glass of red wine is in your hand . Everything in your world is just . Suddenly , the doorbell chimes . You wait a minute , hoping whoever it is will depart and leave you in peace . Unfortunately , they don't , the bell rings again , a rather longer , more insistent kind of tone this time . You sigh , get up from the sofa , take one last look at the picture on the television screen and head reluctantly for the front door . Imagine your surprise when you open the door to find your son , who you thought was 200 miles away , standing on the doorstep . " Hello , " he says , " do you mind putting me up for a few days , not longer than a week of course . I'm having a few problems . " Then you see the bags ? not a small overnight bag , but two large suitcases !

It's a scenario that is being repeated in many homes throughout Europe for a variety of reasons . In fact , even in Britain , where the trend was for young people to leave the nest much earlier than in the rest of Europe , more than a quarter of young people live at home with their parents ? more than at any time since records began in 1966 . What is more , the issue is not merely confined to the so - called 'boomerangers' . Around a quarter of a million individuals aged between 35 and 44 still live at home with their parents .

So what is it causing this sociological shift ? According to researchers , the main reasons include an insecure work , high housing cost , midlife divorces , and straightforward . All these contribute in driving what were perfectly functioning grown - ups back to the bosom of their family .

At this point , some of you older parents , whose teenage children have just abandoned you without so much but a backward glance , might be thinking , " Hmmm , don't see a problem here , mine have gone for only five minutes and I've already lost my purpose in life . " However , recent research from the London School of Economics suggests that the trauma associated with children leaving the nest is far exceeded by the psychological disturbance of their rebound .

Good parenting is ultimately about making yourself redundant , about enabling that squawking baby to into a well adjusted grown - up that has the wherewithal to succeed in the outside world . At some level , those young adults that fail to launch successfully will feel that they have failed , even when it may be circumstances that are the cause . This anxiety is likely to be contagious and the relationships as a consequence . On top of this , many parents feel guilty at the resentment they feel when their new found independence from responsibility disappears and instead they have to share their home again .

Of course , there are compensations for the disruption which run in both directions hopefully . Nevertheless , it young adults to dwell on their parents predicament for a moment and understand that while there is always a place for them in the family home , that something needs to be given in return . This can range from something as easy as respecting the lifestyle of the parents to volunteering to take some part of the domestic duties .